Tag: cancer

Doing Life, Getting it together, Jesus

Why I am not making a New Year’s Resolution or One Word

writergirljenn99

It’s that time of year again. Christmas trees may or may not still be up.  You’re bouncing somewhere between the excitement of a new year and what could be and lazing around after the time off and festivities have left you desiring rest. Maybe you’re cleaning the junk food out of the house either by way of garbage can or your mouth. hahah

I was in a complete funk until last night. I am talking complete funk. I wanted to sleep & sleep some more.  Wanted my tree down but no energy to get it done.  May as well turn the lights on if I have to look at it a while longer.  That’s not happening either since my back is on restrictions my son was the one who’d get down on the floor and plug and unplug the tree, that was until he broke his 3rd bone on Christmas Day. Yes I said 3rd break.

I had done decided months ago I am not falling into that new year new you trap.

Here’s why…

For me resolutions have never worked. not because my plan wasn’t good, but because my motivation was founded in the excitement of the possibilities of what could be.  So this year I am not doing the whole list, I am not even doing a ONE WORD focus. Honestly, I didn’t ever focus on that word for to long after the first anyways. Also in the middle of all this I am going through some personal relational issues with an acquaintance/friend.  I have been so focused on their inadequacies when grace & mercy need to be at the center of my thoughts.  This year has been a year for the books on betrayal, hurt and lies.  I think that’s the biggest reason this recent situation has me so flustered.  My dad is having pre-cancerous issues.  The cells are abnormal but “Not Cancer” umm EXCUSE ME but I thought abnormal cells is the definition of cancer.  In my mind I want to worry, I want to drag him to another doctor for a second opinion.  While that is still on the table I am praying up a storm that God will HEAL.   As if all that weren’t enough our business is going through some challenges that are somewhat out of our control.  These things are making it hard on us with day to day operations.

What got me out of that funk? I watched a sermon that completely moved me in such a way. I awoke today feeling alive.

Instead of a resolution I have to make a choice every single day.

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The decision to put my trust and hope in Jesus Christ.  He has entrusted me with a family, a home, a church family, a business and a temple. Knowing what to do is not rocket science, I just have to awake each day truly thankful for the gift of a new day and do all I know to do and it will all fall into place. 

I praise God for always putting right in my path just what I need to shift my focus.  Praise HIM for being more kind to me than I even deserve.

The truth is we can’t live our lives on the excitement of what could be, instead we must choose to live in the joy of what was done and what is to come.

If you’re struggling too right now,  I encourage you to shift your focus and grab hold of the revelation of Jesus Christ. He created you and me, if He took the time to do that then He’s got this.

  1. He created us.
  2. He sustains us
  3. He redeemed us with HIS blood, outstretched arms, and the weight of every single INADEQUATE decision and action I have ever done.

HE IS COMING BACK

Don’t get me wrong, I am not saying that life won’t throw some tough blows at us, loss, pain, sickness… you name it.  Someone somewhere has went through it.  Find a friend and encourage each other.  Those things will happen and that’s why living in the truth of real JOY is so important because it’s during those tough times we’ll need it most.

My son, my goodness. He is 12, he broke his femur at 8, his elbow at 11, and now this.  Dude didn’t cry, he hasn’t gotten down, he just simply said that “God must have a pretty big plan for all these breaks! I can’t wait to see how it all comes together at the end.”  He blows my mind with his faith and strength.  You know how he knows he is going to be ok… because he is looking back at the last breaks and seeing how God got him through it and our Lord will never forsake us.  That is just one of the truths my son has found true and as Beth Moore says,

“If you have found one thing in the Bible to be true, rest easy, you can take them all to the bank.”

 

Doing Life, Writing

Randomness

writergirljenn99

Being a born again believer can be hard stuff when we constantly stay involved in worldly stuff.   Stuff that leads to destruction is at every twist and turn.  Movies, commercials, certain social situations, and even certain people can be a stumbling block. A magnetic pull to the old life you’d like to leave behind.

I think what irks me more than anything though is when you stand your ground and the person you stand up against tries so hard to convince you that you are anything but a blood bought Christian.   I guess they expect you to roll over and take their crap.

Even while writing this it sure seems like I have written about this before.  In fact I am sure I have. Probably on my old blog, the one that I accidentally let go of without backing everything up. Yeah not a fun time and certainly one of my largest regrets to date.

Speaking of… my 12-year-old son asked me the other day what was my biggest regret. My reply, letting my health go, not staying active and fit. I forgot to add losing valuable blog content to the list.

I have to get focused on being productive with my time. God gives us gifts, talents, careers, money, and time.  Somehow I am squandering all of that away.   I’d like for that to not be true, however that would mean I am in some serious denial.   So I plan to be consistent in my writing. To turn the TV off, to  log off of social media.  I am so hung up on Facebook and I don’t even know why.  My 2nd daughter from another mother is in New York. I absolutely love her and seeing her photos warms my heart, I am so happy for her time there but I must confess that her being so far away is sad.   That’s what I want to see happen again, human contact, humans spending time face to face!  In a world where we can connect easily in a ton of different ways we are so disconnected.  It isn’t gong to get any better unless we are intentional.

This post is just me rambling about a little bit of everything.  I hope this beginning of June is finding you enjoying each moment of life, each new day.   My great friends daughter is battle the C word again, round 2.  My heart breaks for them both. My God is faithful! I am believing He will heal her.